I am now blogging at:

 

http://nobeansprout.livejournal.com

It was a chill that she never thought she'd experience. The kind of feeling that made her want to die - just to die and forget about it - to escape, to run away - to become nothing. The monster that was trying to claw its way out of that corner in her head - the very same monster that threatened to eat her whole being, her existence - to swallow her into oblivion.

Her soul wanted to quail. Her soul wanted to scream until it wiped itself off the face of the planet. She wanted to get away from it.

But how?

Running was the only option. But how could she run when she couldn't even move, the monster holding her in place, gripping her, trapping her, freezing her? She couldn't even speak. She could only watch. Watch as the events transpire, out of her control.

And all the while the monster strenghtened its grip around her.

No way out.

No way out.

No way out. 

The file case I carried in my right hand was quite heavy then, with a little warmth from the newly-photocopied material inside quite sifting through the plastic and reaching my palm. The skies were a light steely gray, and every now and then a stifling breeze would blow, scattering leaves and human hair around me. I watched the high schoolers mulling around with interest; as it turns out, it was the last day for submission of the UPCAT application forms. Looking at their uniforms somehow reminds me that I had once been like them, and that I almost always miss my old school.

 A few more steps took me to the regular jeepney stop near the Faculty Center, and then some ten seconds later I boarded a jeepney heading for MRT Highway. I was seated by the left-hand corner near the exit. The day was tiresome, albeit fun in a way. Turns out it would only get a teensy bit more interesting in that particular ride home.

 Now, it’s a usual routine everywhere we go and everytime we ride a jeepney that we have to ask someone else to pass up our handful of coins to the driver to be able to pay back our fare. I’ve had my own countless chances of passing up someone’s payments. More often than not I don’t really get a tiny “Thank you” or “Maraming salamat”, but it’s fine with my anyway.

 Now there was this guy – by the looks of him, I am not sure if he’s a professor from our beloved school or not – who suddenly started to rant when our jeepney passed by the street leading to the NCPAG building, just a little way beyond the landmarks checkpoint stops. His words are as close as I could remember them...

 ”Mga taga-UP ‘yan ha. Mga edukado. Pero tignan mo naman, hindi man lamang marunong mag thank you. Kaunting decorum lang naman yun... pagpapakita ng breeding... manners...”

 His voice was slightly raised, and the other students in the jeepney along with me (along with two spectators) didn’t even bother to comment. In my head otherwise, I was struck with some thought. Though I am not one to hand over my payments without even saying thank you (nor am I bragging that I am one of them goody-two-shoes types), the man’s words struck me.

 In a world a-flurry with change, tragedy, everyone’s own lives, fear, anger and hope...do we all really bother to even stop a while and say “thank you?” Not just for having other people pass up our payment to the jeepney driver. Not just for a professor allowing you to prerog for his or her class. Not just for a diligent worker in a canteen who cleans up your dishes when you’re done eating. Not just for the parents who provide us with much-needed allowance.

 The man’s pronouncement, I guess, said these words clearly to me: WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU SAID THANK YOU TO SOMEONE?

 I did see the man’s point, but I couldn’t bring myself to agree with the way he said it (honestly, ranting that loud in a jeepney...). I don’t even need to go on and on about the UPian’s reputation. We’re UP students, we know who we are better than anyone else. But being too indifferent to even the smallest things isn’t becoming of us.

 So how about you, when was the last time you said thank you?

Magkaka DSL wireless din sa wakas, hehehehe Hindi na ko mabobore...

Kelan kaya enrollment sa UPD? Makahabol kaya mga TCG ko?

Nagyayaya si Tito Jer na bumalik daw ng Baguio sa 28, four days. Ayoko sumama. Sawang sawa na ko dun sa bundok na yun! Kung babalik man ako e after five years pa. Kahit mainit dito sa Manila, e, inde ko pa rin pagpapalit bahay ko dun, kahit patirahin pa ko ng UP sa hotel...

Dito kasi e wala akong pinoproblema kundi mag aral lang. Doon...susme! Lahat poproblemahin mo mula agahan hanggang hapunan! Buti na lang at summer na!

Excited na ko sa pasukan!  

I'm finally home, with cartloads of my stuff and pasalubong for the peepz. The journey home was a bit tiring, especially right after my History II exam, but it feels good to be able to see skyscrapers again. The university is slow on releasing the other reqs I need to finally complete my transfer. I can't wait until June comes.